A Critique of Punctuation and Clarity in Local Media
The persistent issue of poor punctuation and grammatical errors in local print media continues to be a source of frustration for many readers. This problem is not limited to just a few writers but seems to permeate the entire industry, including op-eds from so-called “veterans” who are expected to set an example. The lack of basic understanding of what constitutes a full sentence is alarming, with many articles merging multiple sentences into one without proper punctuation.
This oversight not only confuses readers but also undermines the credibility of the content. For instance, some writers use commas incorrectly, treating them as sentence-ending punctuation, which leads to awkward and unclear phrasing. To address this, media leaders should consider organizing in-house training sessions focused on grammar basics, particularly the structure of sentences and the correct use of punctuation.
Language Issues in Recent Articles
One recent article on Page 4 of Bongo’s senior-most broadsheet, published on October 25, featured a photo caption that read: “Permanent Secretary in the ministry of Agriculture, Mr Gerald Mweli, explains about 250 sprinkler machines that will be distributed FOR ‘approximately’ 2,264 farmers across seven regions…”
The use of the word “for” here is incorrect; it should be “to.” Additionally, the term “approximately” is problematic because the number 2,264 appears exact. If the figure is indeed approximate, it would be more accurate to say “at least 2,260 farmers” or “nearly 2,300 farmers.”
On the same day, a headline on Page 1 of the broadsheet stated, “TZ records 10pc decline in mobile money fraud.” The article’s introduction included the phrase, “Tanzania has recorded a SIGNIFICANT 10 per cent decline in mobile money fraud attempts between June and September this year…”
Once a specific percentage is provided, there is no need to label it as “significant.” Readers can assess the significance based on the context and data presented in the article. Adding redundant qualifiers like “significant” can come across as unnecessary and even manipulative.
Headline Redundancy and Clarity
Another issue observed was the repetition of the word “assured” in headlines on the same page. The lead story had the headline, “Safe, orderly vote ASSURED,” while another headline read, “Observers ASSURED of free, peaceful polls.” This repetition is not only unoriginal but also reflects a lack of creativity in headline writing.
An alternative approach could be to rephrase the second headline to something like, “Expect peaceful, free elections, observers told.” This eliminates the redundancy and provides a clearer message.
Confusing Headlines and Sub-Editing Challenges
Page 4 of the broadsheet featured a headline that read, “Stakeholders/ push 20pc national/ budget education.” The use of slashes and the lack of clarity made it difficult to understand the intended message. After reading the introduction, it became clear that the headline was meant to convey, “Education stakeholders have urged the government to allocate at least 20 per cent of the national budget to the education sector…”
A more effective headline might be, “Call for upped/budget to/boost education.” However, the challenge of fitting headlines into multi-decked templates often leads to confusion and ambiguity, making sub-editors’ jobs more complicated.
Misleading and Ambiguous Headlines
On Page 6 of Bongo’s broadsheet, an opinion piece had the headline, “Low oxygen chocking Lake Victoria, before adding fishing nets pollution.” This headline was confusing and required further reading to understand the actual message. A revised version could be, “Low oxygen chocks Lake Victoria/fishing nets pollution makes matters worse.”
Such issues highlight the importance of clear and concise language in journalism. English, as a language, can be treacherous, and careful attention to detail is essential to ensure that the message is communicated effectively.
If you have any photos or examples of linguistic gems, feel free to send them to abdisul244@gmail.com or WhatsApp at Tel No 0688315580.